For a long time, I have been wanting to blog about this, maybe to overcome my melancholic-phlegmatic temperament... or maybe this is just another aftermath of the crying session I (again) had last night for another irrelevant reason?

I have my ups and downs, my insecurities, worries, concerns and I am the typical maldita... Yes, things can get to me the moment they occur... And in retrospect, I have done several things I wish I never did (mostly things that come out of my mouth....) And yet, I am at a point of my life that inspite of all the external things going on, I am happy and at peace (yup, the real deal "gaudium cum pace").

I remember being asked in a high school English class what everyone of us wanted to have the most. I answered, "Serenity." I must have been at another highly stressed near-depressive episode at that time... And now, I can say that, I have finally found it.

Joy and peace comes when you know that you are doing the right thing at the right time, although mistakes may be forecoming along the way. It is knowing that you care for a lot of people, and you are being cared for as well. Someone will guide you as you also guide others. When you stumble and fall, you can run back into the confessional and get up again. It is leaving all the silly fears behind since anyway, when you make a mistake, you will be told and helped to make amends.

It is alright that you aren't perfect. The important thing is you are striving to atain heaven.

Everyday, I see people in the hospital, people I work with and work alongside with and I sometimes wonder if those seemingly cheerful faces have a sadness to hide. In one way or another, I find out that at times everything is just a facade, and this or that person seems to have no idea where his/her life is headed... Another party, another ball game, vices, pleasures... I would sometimes just shake my head, and silently pray (I'm not the type of person who will say things unless that audience is at an apt time to listen) for that soul's concerns.

And all these wrong notions about how one has to live one's life... I know that if I shall ask them: "Are you happy?", they would probably say "Yes", but as a lie. When will they wake up and realize that things can get so much better?

Once again, I shall say, "I may not be prefect, and oh, I have so many defects... Yet deep inside I am secure in the love of God for me... And that brings with it all the joy, peace and serenity that I need for myself and to be shared with those around me as well."

Consequences of Artificial Methods

Responsible men can become more deeply convinced of the truth of the doctrine laid down by the Church on this issue if they reflect on the consequences of methods and plans for artificial birth control. Let them first consider how easily this course of action could open wide the way for marital infidelity and a general lowering of moral standards. Not much experience is needed to be fully aware of human weakness and to understand that human beings—and especially the young, who are so exposed to temptation—need incentives to keep the moral law, and it is an evil thing to make it easy for them to break that law. Another effect that gives cause for alarm is that a man who grows accustomed to the use of contraceptive methods may forget the reverence due to a woman, and, disregarding her physical and emotional equilibrium, reduce her to being a mere instrument for the satisfaction of his own desires, no longer considering her as his partner whom he should surround with care and affection.

Finally, careful consideration should be given to the danger of this power passing into the hands of those public authorities who care little for the precepts of the moral law. Who will blame a government which in its attempt to resolve the problems affecting an entire country resorts to the same measures as are regarded as lawful by married people in the solution of a particular family difficulty? Who will prevent public authorities from favoring those contraceptive methods which they consider more effective? Should they regard this as necessary, they may even impose their use on everyone. It could well happen, therefore, that when people, either individually or in family or social life, experience the inherent difficulties of the divine law and are determined to avoid them, they may give into the hands of public authorities the power to intervene in the most personal and intimate responsibility of husband and wife.